We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
