I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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