Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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