you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize