Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
