i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
