Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
handjob tips. give me some.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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