Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
