I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
