It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
