Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
please come you make the beer taste better
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
