dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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