he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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