dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize