Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
