her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
