brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
He did a backflip because drugs
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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