Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
i think i just lost a toe
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
