You work out of a Hotel?
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
Randomize
