im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
