I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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