Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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