I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
