she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Michael Bay diarrhea
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
