I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
