Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
