Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
