Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Randomize
