I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
