I cockslap morals
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
