Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
