Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
