I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize