used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
