im drinking this country out of the recession.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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