i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Randomize
