she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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