used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
