Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Randomize
