It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
