super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Randomize