She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
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