how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
