I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
she peed on how many people?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Randomize
