so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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