Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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