I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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