who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
