I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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