I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
